• Kamal Khurana

How to stop thinking negative about someone - by Dr. Kamal Khurana


The mind is an over smart thinking machine. Either you give the mind some task or it will start thinking on its own.


By the way, it happens to everyone, you are no different. There is good news - that if you understand this fact about the mind (that you must give it a direction to think, else it will start thinking on its own) and you can develop a habit to intentionally take control over the mind.

Let us learn more about the mind. The mind was given by nature to humans so that it can sense fear and find out away, as a reaction to the trigger of fear. This is quite a primitive trait present in almost all the other species as well. Humans are a little different in this. They learn ways to deal with life (which is called a defense mechanism or survival mechanism) in their growing years.


And everyone carries their survival mechanisms till they live. If these survival mechanisms are creating difficulty in someone's four areas of life - i.e career, relationships, health, social life, then it becomes important to make changes in the survival mechanisms. So if the thinking is becoming negative and is adversely impacting self or others, then following are few actions one needs to consciously & intentionally take.



  • SENSE THAT I AM BEING NEGATIVE

This is the first step to deal with negative thinking. how can one work o something if he/she is unaware of that thing? If you are aware, then feel good about this fact that you have accomplished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to develop this sense.



  • KEEPING A TRACK OF SUSPICIOUS & PARANOID THOUGHTS

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • LOOK FOR RATIONALE BEHIND - CHECK FACTS

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • THINK EMPATHETICALLY - THAT OTHER HAS A VALID REASON

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • DON’T OVERGENERALISE THAT OTHER HAS NO OTHER TASK

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • DON’T THINK TOO BIG OF YOURSELF THAT THE WORLD WANTS TO GET YOU

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • BE LESS SELF CONSCIOUS

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOUR OPINION & A FACT

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • IF OTHERS GIVEN SOME OPINION ABOUT YOU - GIVE A DAMN ABOUT OPINION - IT’S NOT A FACT

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • CONSCIOUSLY THINK THAT THE WORLD IS FULL MAJORLY OF GOOD PEOPLE

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • THOSE WHO ARE IN PAIN NEED YOUR EMPATHY - NOBODY IS BORN BAD - SEE THEIR VULNERABILITY & UNADDRESSED NEED AS IF THEY ARE A KID

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • TRUST PEOPLE - TRUST THEY ARE ALL GOOD - LEARN TO ADDRESS THEIR PAIN

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • AVOID TALKING - THINKING MENTIONING ABOUT YOUR PAST

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • SEE CRITICISM AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO IMPROVE - GOPAL - UNDERSTAND PEOPLE’S UNADDRESSED NEEDS

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • ACCEPT THAT EVERYONE CAN’T BE YOUR FRIEND

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • TALK IT OUT AND AUTHENTICALLY AIM TO RESOLVE (WITHOUT BLAME)

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • MAKE A LIST OF GREAT CONTRIBUTION YOU HAVE MADE

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



  • MAKE A LIST OF POSITIVE FEEDBACK & COMPLIMENTS YOU HAVE GOT

complished the first stage. Now you need to keep a track and build a sense that you are getting a negative thinking loop. With practice and conscious effort, you will be able to de



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By scheduling this session, you are acknowledging the understanding that you are booking Kamal for a coaching session and not therapy. Results depend completely on your openness, ability and commitment to act on the outcomes of the sessions.

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